Despair's End - Josh x Chris
by semi-automatic21
Summary: Josh and Chris had been friends for almost seven years before everything got confusing. One day, Chris woke up in Josh's bed without any previous memories from the night before. Josh just said it was cold and they were drinking, that was until Chris took the covers off and Josh was, in fact, completely naked.


This is a ship that takes place before the incident of Hannah and Beth's dissapearance, between two main characters Chris and Josh from the game Until Dawn. No massive spoilers, but some things will be revealed. Read at your own risk!

Warnings: Metions of depression, Suicidal thoughts & actions, Mentions of sex, M/M

-  
Chris unravelled his fingers from Josh's, feeling his hot breath warm his neck. He was pretty sure the brunette was still asleep, so he carefully sat up on the bed and blinked.

He was unmistakably in Josh's room, but… why was he asleep next to Josh whilst also holding his hand? Sounded like an intro to something gay.

"Cochise?" He heard Josh mumble into his pillow, blinking his green eyes slightly.

"Yeah. What the hell happened last night?" He replied, a headache forming behind his eyes.

"Alcohol." Josh chuckled in that weird way of his, his eyes now fully open.

"Yeah but, like, what happened?"

Josh was silent for a few moments. "Hmm, I dunno. Cuddling for warmth I guess."

Chris rolled his eyes as Josh made a kissy face.

He swung his body over the edge of the bed, pulling of the layers of covers in the process.

"Um, Josh?"

"Yeah dude?"

"Why aren't you wearing any clothes?"

It was now a few days after that whole "incident" and neither Josh or Chris knew exactly what happened that night.

"Maybe we fucked." Josh said very much too loud.

"But like, I'm not gay." Chris replied quietly.

Josh was silent.

"I have a therapist appointment later today. Can you drive me there? The new meds make me drowsy."

Chris nodded, but frowned. "What about your parents?"

"Out." Was the only thing he muttered, but Chris knew that wasn't the only thing.

A few hours later they got in Josh's car and started driving. It was pretty far away so they stopped by Taco bell on the way to get some burritos. While Josh was eating his Chris used the privacy to talk about… everything.

"Josh, if we really did fuck, what's gonna happen?"

Josh blinked and looked up from his burrito. "What do you mean?"

"Well-" Christ sighed, his grip tightening on the steering wheel. "Truthfully I'm not… straight."

Josh raised his eyebrows and let him keep talking.

"I've always like you," He said quietly. "But I never really knew if that was because you're my friend or not."

Josh looked into the distance thoughtfully as rain started to fall outside. "I've always been gay."

Chris looked at him. "Wait, what?"

He shrugged. "I've never told anyone because my parents are pretty… you know."

Josh really hated his parents. Strit, uptight, distant. Chris got that. Being an only child was hard, but at least his parents were there for him. Josh never felt that.

"Josh, how drunk were you the other night?"

Silence.

"Not as much as you." He muttered under his breath as Chris pulled into the carpark.

Quickly getting out of the car, he sighed as rain fell onto his tanned face. "I'll be an hour, cochise. Feel free to do whatever. Whatch porn for all I care." Chris rolled his eyes as he turned off the ignition and watched the rain as Josh headed inside.

The rain slowly got harder as time progressed, and Chris didn't really do anything. He just… thought. What he felt for Ashley wasn't close to what he felt for Josh. He had always thought that was only because they had been best friends for seven years, but… what if he was gay? What would his parents think? It was all too confusing. He ended up falling asleep in the seat before Josh came into the car and looked at him.

**Josh**

He looked at Chris sleeping and suddenly wanted to kiss him. "Cochise?" He said quietly, waving his hand in front of Chris' face. Nope, he was out cold. Josh sighed. He hated going to therapy, but Chris bringing him here made it better. But now, Josh had made everything awkward. He never ended up telling Chris that is was his idea. He nudged the blonde awake and looked out the window.

"Oh, sorry dude. Must've drifted." He said tiredly, waiting a few moments before turning the ignition on again.

"Chris, can we go out?"

He looked at Josh, his cheeks turning a scarlet red. "W-What?"

Josh shrugged. "We can like… work it out. I dunno." He realized how dumb that sounded when he said it. Very cheesy.

"I mean, sure." Chris replied. "Where?"

"How about we just drive into the woods?" Chris nodded.

"Alright." He started to back out of the carpark.

Josh looked at Chris once more and wanted to be with him.

As they drove further into the woods, Josh told Chris to pull over. He obeyed, confused.

"Chris, I remember what happened the other night."

Chris looked at him. "You do?" He said quietly.

"Yes. And it wasn't just being blackout drunk or doing something stupid. It was love."

Chris' cheeks burned red again.

"Do you love me?" He asked.

Josh nodded as the rain continued to fall.

They drove in silence for a while until they got to a small point on the edge of town. The got out of the car and sat down on the bench.

"Do you ever wonder what it feels like to just… stop?" Josh asked, looking at the view below.

Chris cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, people love me, I get that. But what if it's just wrong? To get attached to people you're going to mourn over? Suicide is selfish, yet, people do it because they either have nobody or don't want to say goodbye." He said quietly, not looking at Chris. "But we have to cherish the moments we have left with the people we love, and that's what I don't get. I want to die but I don't want to leave my sisters, or you for that matter. I want to just stop."

Chris was silent.

"I get that. Life moves too fast. But know Josh, I'm always here." He replied, taking Josh's hand in his.

Josh smiled. "Thanks, Cochise. I love you."

"I love you, too."

Josh didn't know who kissed who first, but it felt like the most natural thing in the world. Fireworks went off inside his heart as Chris held him, all his worries and fears melting away into the setting sun. Chris pulled him closer, and they sat there, kissing. Josh wanted it to never end, and it felt like only a little bit before Chris pulled away.

"When do your parents get home?" He asked, staring into Josh's eyes.

"Tomorrow. Why?"

Chris gave Josh as smirk, and he instantly knew what he was thinking.

Thank you for reading, more will be out shortly :)


End file.
